This narrative of queerness supports the idea that being different is only okay if you can’t help it. The “born this way” story says that having a sexual orientation other than hetrosexual/heteroromantic attraction is only acceptable if you cannot be straight. It is only okay to be trans if your gender identity is so deeply ingrained in you that you cannot change it no matter what. The utter failure of conversion therapies is seen as evidence that being queer is okay – we tried to change people and make then normal and it didn’t work, so the next best option is to accept people as they are.
The “born this way” narrative supports a structure of cisgender and heterosexual supremacy that does real harm to queer people. It maintains the idea that the world would be better if we were all cisgender, heterosexual, gender conforming, monogamous, etc. Our difference is only begrudgingly acceptable because it cannot be helped.
–Benny Vimes on narratives.
The born this way narrative has been undeniably useful in the fight for queer rights, and for a lot of queer individuals it holds true. But, even if it doesn’t, so what? Other people’s gender and/or sexual identities don’t impact me (or you, or anyone else for that matter), so why should I care whether or not those identities are innately biological or socially constructed or something else entirely? I mean, it’s interesting, from like a sociological/scientific/personal point of view. But other than that… meh. You do you, people.