So just why are Kinder Surprise eggs illegal in the United States? Well, tl;dr, but you can blame the pharmaceuticals manufacturer the S.E. Massengill Company for that one, after they basically intentionally poisoned people in the 1930s, prompting a change in food and drug safety laws, the wording of which still, to this day, prohibits American children from enjoying the tasty tasty treat that is the Kinder Surprise.