You’re heard of the Scripture Union, now get ready for After School Satan.

To be clear, yes, this is a real thing, and it’s an initiative of that branch of Satanists that are basically atheists/humanists with blacker clothes and a hard-on for church-state separation.1

As someone who ended up going to way more SU meets than I ever really wanted to in high school (all my friends went, so what else was I supposed to do during lunch?), and was also a budding atheist and massive wannabe goth, I would totally have been into this. Also, my parents weren’t big on restrictive rules when I was growing up, but “don’t draw pictures of demons” was one of them,2 so joining Satan Club to learn about materialist rationalism would’ve been, like, A-grade teen rebellion right there.

  1. As opposed to the Church of Satan, who are the “classical”, LaVeyan Satanists and, ironically, really fuckin’ hate the Satanic Temple. []
  2. Gods only know why. The closest thing my parents had to a religion was Hippie Buddhism, and we had thangka of Mara hanging up in the house, so… who knows. []