So the other week I admittedly on Mastodon that I secretly kinda like those ridiculous Glacce water bottles Goop sells with the rose quartz spars up the middle. Not because I think they’re magic or whatever, but just because I like shiny things and crystals. But even I (yes, even I) have some limits on how much I will pay for a joke item and, more importantly, Goop will get my money over my dead goddamn body.
A helpful soul pointed out people totally sold “knock-off” versions (i.e. versions-sans-logo-but-that-let’s-be-honest-almost-certainly-come-from-the-same-factory) on eBay for $20 and. Well. I am very weak.
Fast forward and I am now the proud owner of one amethyst crystal water bottle! It is both completely ridiculous and everything I could’ve hoped for… and also surprisingly better quality than I’d be expecting. The one thing that weirds me out is how the bottom screws off because, like… what if the water falls out?1
All that aside, I can now drink water like a True Rich White Lady™, mess with fishslappers and, most importantly, my water bottle now matches my bracelets like nature intended. Perfect.
- It’s actually dripping on me right now as I write this, which honestly I’d be pissed about for $80 but at $20 is just kinda lol whatevs. [↩]
(Note: it’s actually seeds from the poplar trees and FLOATING DEATH to anyone with allergies. Also apparently a huge problem in China!)
Me: … and yeah it’s totally the little things that throw you out. Like I was reading this one fic where a character put his shoes in the washing machine and everyone acted like it was totally normal.
Literally everyone I know: It’s totally normal to put shoes in the washing machine! I’m washing my shoes right now!
Me: … wtaf?
Everyone: How else do you get clean shoes?
Me: … w t a f ?
I just purchased and hung up a three-in-one clingfilm/paper towel/alfoil dispenser for my kitchen, and I think it’s literally the Most Adult thing I’ve ever done.
Like, it’s so adult I remember when my mum bought her original three-in-one dispenser and hung it up. It’s like some kind of… inter-generational homeowner tradition thing or something.
Me: [Walks into our apartment building’s gym. It’s usually empty this time of day, but this evening there’s an older guy watching TV.]
Him: [Noticing I’m holding an iPhone and a portable speaker.] I can turn the TV off. I’d prefer to listen to music, anyway.
Me: Um. Actually I was going to listen to an audiobook about corporate sponsorship of the rise of ultra-conservative Christianity in the US.
Him: … oh. [Leaves the TV on while I read on my iPhone instead.]
So it occurs to me that, by the end of the month, I will have:
- Submitted a manuscript.
- Bought a new apartment.
- Moved into the new apartment.
- Adopted a dog (probably).
That… is a pretty busy 31 days.